Mark Carson.

Say His Name.

Come see me perform these gems in NO HOLDS BARRED @ DIXON PLACE .

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1. you/me

to live is to die 

to die to breath

with each breathe 

another step towards death

a movement of acidic tears that singe my cheeks, leaving a trail of burns-hollowed trenches down my face

i scratch and scratch and scratch at the colored walls and cliffs of insanity

climbing the many mirages of mountainous deaths

beyond the windy dancers of the ambiguous sleeping spell and

fall into a tumble towards a forever valley of the factual actual dream

a dream that is life

a life that is love

a love that is yours

a yours that is mine

and in our dependence we learn to be there for one another

you-standing on my spirit to look me in the eye

me- stealing all the air then offering you my breathe

we love so hard

grasping so carelessly tight

so safe in our instability

crying in the comfort of our morose

a kind of cold where the sun can barely keep warm

a smile so hollow it cracks at the slightest quake

regret so thick with resentment, stagnation is not an option but an inevitability

i see right through you tightly grasping the knife behind your back

where shall you cut today?

my intelligence?

my heart?

… my manhood?

I am a glass house holding stones ready to be launched

I am a pot screeching at the blackness in your eyes

screaming as i fall helplessly into them

crashing my lips upon your lips

again tangled we tie my skin around your skin

entwined in the unhappy discomfort of our joy

i touch you push you push i pull you pull i cling and melt 

you melt into me

in this turbulent troubled sea 

we are sinking fast 

pulling the other one down to stay afloat

but i cant do this anymore

so use me

use me to stay above the poisonous waters 

for a few short extra minutes

and ill do my best 

not to suffocate 

from your weight

with no air beneath this violent seascape

giving my last of life

to sacrifice once more 

for a love i stopped believing in long ago.

2.  if i could

If i could lay on the inside curve of your ear, I would tell you all my secrets

If i could stand on the cliff of your cheek, I would dance for laughter causing earthquakes beneath my feet

If i could hang from the tip of your nose by the tips of my toes, id kiss those lips from crook to next

scale the jawline to your eye 

sip your tears

make your sadness mine

so i may know your pain

and ease it

im painting passion on your chest

a mural of our future

dripping down your ribcage like mini waterfalls

collecting into a sea of your pelvic thrusts

im swimming backstrokes in the calm

toasting in the light and warmth of your beauty

penetrating pores

infusing inspiration cellularly

binding to my skeleton

carving a repeated message into my organs

that reads “you and me forever”

if i could if i could if i could

i would

but i cant

because you’re not here yet

so ill wait under the willow with its tears dancing on the top of my head

writing poems

i will celebrate with words running rivers over rocks made of paper

searching for a gathering place 

a bountiful space

hollowed out grace generated by our two souls

and when that day comes

and our lips meet

and the sky opens up with falling rain

flooding the earth beneath our feet

and that rain fiercely rises fast

violently upwards

lungs smothered

in our love

i will gladly drown with you

dying the best death

the death of our lonely selves

giving way to life beginning

two babies born infused at the palms

to crawl, walk, dance through life

like the trumpet sounds in Miles Davis’ Flamenco Sketches

tenderly tapping playing barefoot footsies over deep,soft green grass

guided by a rich blue sky studded with stars, sharp shards of light, piercingly bright

and forever wrapped in a playful evening breeze that feels like cool silk sheets covering our skin

and if in our old age, if in our forever life of love

you should die a physical death

becoming one with the earth beneath my feet

i shall walk the rest of my days on my hands

till i fall over flat on my back into your arms

and join you in the afterlife

So I know I have like 6 followers on here and its been a while since I’ve shared a new poem… but here you go. I’m kind of loving this. I hope you do too.

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i never gave the best parts of me

it was just sex

i didn’t let him see me laugh

i didn’t show any of my intricacies for him to put together the puzzle made of me

i always respected him

never inching too close

never crossing any guarded gates

but i was never loyal

i never loved him

we were empty steel shells playing boyfriends with each others arms

twisting, scratching, bleeding from the metal shavings pricked in our nail beds

all the while placing a lock down with an iron skin shrouding our insides

he too came at me empty

that glossy exchange of looks like two lovers in a porn

smashed pelvis’

thrusting to break consciousness 

into pretty pieces of hollow

ecstasy rained transience over our bodies that night

sending electricity sailing along our spines

lightbulbs bursting at each passing station

glass cutting guilefully throughout the most subterranean parts of our organs

filling us with the guilt we left behind at his door

i couldnt breathe and had to run to escape the dripping downhearted wet rag

placed over my mouth by his poisoned kisses

but i too had a safety

i hid my anxieties in the pleasures of backside to thighs

under his tongue

in the nook behind his knees

so from the quivers we created

he may collapse 

into a pile of bones burying whatever secrets I may have let slip out